Sometimes, you wonder why you can never decide on something and then realize that it’s not you – it’s your partner. Here’s how you can deal with it. Indecisiveness is a common trait among many people. But little did we know that there is an underlying cause to this slightly annoying habit.
Women, in particular, seem to be drawn to indecisive men because these men have an air of mystery and are challenging. Who doesn’t love a mysterious challenge, right? Well once in a while it may be nice, but when it’s all the time, what do you do? Here’s your guide to dealing with an indecisive man!
Like a Moth to the Flame
If indecisive men annoy you, stop dating them! When you’re with someone, you tend to think about them a lot. Did you know that when the brain has one person in its thoughts on a regular basis, it tricks itself into thinking that person must be important? The end result can be the feeling of attraction, infatuation or love.
So how can you avoid feeling love when you shouldn’t? Date more than one guy at a time! Get to know each of them and when you find one who isn’t indecisive (and great in other ways), dump the others and date this guy exclusively. You can quit indecisive guys for good!
When a guy is indecisive, it’s often the result of a past relationship with a woman (an ex or his mother) who made all the decisions for him. These guys seek guidance and assurance in everything and anything they do. One way to turn this around is to show him the consequences of his indecision. Let him know that being indecisive is actually a decision. It’s the decision to shrink the number of responsibilities he has and it’s the decision to not want to be responsible for the outcome of anything. Show him how being indecisive leads to regrets. He could regret not acting at all more than acting and making a poor decision.
I’ll quote the great philosopher, Mr. Miyagi (The Karate Kid) here: “Walk on road, hmm? Walk left side, safe. Walk right side, safe. Walk middle, sooner or later—get squish just like grape.”
Clearly, being indecisive isn’t the best choice.
Indecisive guys can be changed, but it’s up to you to help them! Are you up to the challenge? If you are, try giving your indecisive guy small decisions to make throughout the day. You could ask him to help you pick out what shirt to wear to work. You could ask him to help you decide what you two should have for dinner. As he gains confidence, give him harder choices to make, like where to take your next vacation together or which family to visit for the holidays.
Never scold him for the decisions he makes! The point is to get him to make decisions. So even if he picks a red shirt for you (when you would have preferred a blue one), don’t give him a hard time. And if he makes a decision that doesn’t work out well, don’t dwell on it. Let him know it’s okay and move on.
If your indecisive guy is trying to get you to make a decision instead, don’t fall for it! Do a coin toss! Literally take a coin out of of your purse and toss it in the air. For example, if you asked your indecisive guy to decide where to go for dinner, heads would be one place, while tails would be the other. Toss the coin in the air (not at you guy, even if you want to really badly) and let the coin decide. When you leave the decision up to the fate of a coin toss, you’re showing your guy that the decision that needs to be made isn’t a big one.
Bladder Half Full?
One study suggests that most anyone makes their best decisions while their bladder is over 50 percent full. This can be particularly helpful for an indecisive guy. According to researchers, the bladder-half-full trick seems to help people rationalize their decisions, and make choices they will be happier with in the end. They have not been able to pinpoint exactly what it is about a half-full bladder that creates this heightened sense of right and wrong. But rather than ponder this mystery, pour your indecisive guy a tall drink, move far away from the restroom, and then ask him the important questions!