A life lived with regret is yours to miss. Never apologize for following a dream because that dream makes you who you are. You will never fulfill happiness unless you live your dreams instead of dreaming your life. Often, we apologize because we worry too much about what other people think, or because we put their feelings above our own needs. There are many situations where an apology is unnecessary.
Here are five things you don’t have to apologize for—no matter what:
Asking for What You Want or Need
How many times have you opened an everyday request with “I’m sorry to trouble you, but…”? Odds are good, it’s relatively often, especially at work. If you’re asking for something you want or need in order to do your job, you don’t owe anyone an apology. Constantly apologizing before you ask for something isn’t going to get you promoted or earn the respect of your co-workers. What you’re asking for is commonplace. If you’re just apologizing to be polite, know that there are other ways to be polite to your co-workers when asking them for something. Instead of saying you’re sorry, why not ask if it’s a good time to make a request. If they say yes, proceed with your question. If they say no, ask for a better time. No apology needed!
Going After Your Heart’s Desire
You only live once and you’ve only got one person to please—you. If you’re constantly apologizing to others for not living the life they want, stop. You don’t owe it to anyone to silence the song that plays in your soul, so stop apologizing for who you are and who you feel you’re destined to be. If you don’t live the life you want, you owe yourself an apology.
When a friend, colleague or loved one asks you for your opinion, don’t apologize for giving it. They asked for the truth, so you should be truthful! Just be sure to be gentle and kind with your opinion. Kindness and a gentleness go a long when when giving constructive feedback. If you apologize before you give your opinion, it means that you feel like what you are saying or doing is wrong. Since opinions aren’t facts, that can’t be the case. And you’re entitled to your opinion, so give it without apologizing!
Getting What You Want
What’s worse than apologizing for going after what you want? Try getting what you want and then apologizing for it afterwards! Success is not something to be embarrassed about, so don’t apologize for it as if you are ashamed of it. Success is something to be proud of, just don’t become boastful—that’s something to apologize for. If you’re not excited about your achievements, who will be?
Doing the Right Thing for Yourself
Being true to yourself should be your number-one priority. Even when faced with a difficult situation, you should go with your gut instinct and think about what’s best for you. Whether it’s breaking up with someone, refusing a job offer or any number of situations that could cause you to disappoint someone, you have to do what feels right and do it without apologizing. You can be truly sorry for the hurt or stress your decision causes, but you should never be sorry for making the best decision for yourself.
Oh, perfect! Now I can finally stop apologizing for wanting the last slice of pizza. It’s my heart’s desire, after all. Who cares if someone else wanted it?
Exactly! And while you’re at it, make sure to loudly proclaim your success in securing said slice. No apologies, remember?
It’s important to balance asking for what you need with the social dynamics of your environment. While the advice given is sound in a vacuum, one must also be aware of cultural and workplace norms that may not readily accept such directness.
I find this advice oversimplified. Sure, it’s great to not apologize for fulfilling your desires, but isn’t there a level of social responsibility we must uphold? Living purely for oneself can often lead to selfish behavior that disregards the impact on those around you.
This article is a refreshing reminder to live authentically and unapologetically. It’s empowering to read something that encourages us to put our own happiness first and to stop feeling guilty for doing so. Indeed, how can we be of any value to others if we constantly undermine our own needs and desires?
Absolutely. Self-care isn’t selfish; it’s essential. If we don’t prioritize our own well-being, how can we expect to be genuinely helpful or present for others?
This is just another self-help fluff piece. Not everyone has the luxury to just ‘stop apologizing’ and demand what they want, especially in professional settings. Reality check: there are consequences for that kind of behavior in the real world.